I was getting kind of tired of Coach CarolLaine saying obvious shit. But it wasn’t her I was tired of—it was me.

“Oh, so there’s no room for Self—got it!” After looking at my Wheel of Life results and hearing about what’s on my calendar every week, Dra. CarolLaine called out the one thing I had been ignoring for months.

I had no idea what to expect when I joined our first coaching call, but what I got was a lot of tears. No, she didn’t make me cry by doing anything in particular. I was just finally in a safe space with someone who looked like me and could relate to my experiences, and I let it all out.

Here I am, almost 32, 4 years into ~entrepreneurship~ and wondering when the hell I’ll feel “stable” again. That’s something I still struggle to wrap my mind around. My earning potential as a book coach and editor far surpasses my earning potential as an architect, but I haven’t been able to replace my old income (yet). It’s maddening.

I crave expression. And I don’t want my subconscious to be all like, “But what will your audience think?” when I want to share something real. (Do I know what real is? Meh, not really, or not always, but still.) I don’t want to be thinking about my clients or prospective clients or business partners who follow me. I just want to create. And even if they end up following me here, too, I owe them nothing when I’m casually contemplating. What a relief!